Question:
I’m stressed out thinking about Christmas gifts. How do you figure out what gifts are from Santa and what gifts are from the parents? I want Christmas morning to be so magical that I’m afraid I’m buying too much and it will backfire. You have so many kids that I figure you’ll have some advice. Can you help? — Abby
Answer:
Great question, Abby! Every year around this time, I get similar questions, so I know this is something that many parents think about. I’ll answer in 3 parts.
1) As for buying too much, here’s what has worked for our family. I use a guideline I learned from my sister-in-law: Santa Claus brings something to read, something to wear and something to play with for each child. Just three things. They end up with other gifts too — from siblings and grandparents or other relatives, but Santa only leaves 3 under the tree.
Having a guideline in place makes it much easier to curb the amount of stuff coming into our house and to keep our holiday budget in check.
2) Regarding parent gifts, Ben Blair and I don’t give gifts to the kids (meaning there is nothing under the tree labeled “to Olive from Mom” or “to Betty from Dad”). In our case this has worked well. There are enough gifts on Christmas morning that the little ones don’t notice. And as the the kids grow older and get to know Santa, they feel loved anyway.
But. I know that wouldn’t work in every family. (You may have noticed, people have strong(!) and varied opinions surrounding Santa and parent gifts.) One of my friends has Santa bring one big thing and the rest of the presents are from Mom and Dad — which seems to work swimmingly for her family. So ask around until you hear something that would be a good fit at your house. I’m sure you’ll come up with just the thing.
3) I hear you on wanting Christmas morning to be magical. That’s my goal too. So I adopted something my mother would do. Before the kids run to the tree, I go in first and make sure the tree lights are on, some soft Christmas music is playing, and the gifts are displayed to their best advantage. If we have one that year, an electric train running around its track is a nice touch. I find the magic is less about the gifts and more about the presentation and mood.
What about you, Dear Readers? What advice would you give Abby? Do you have a gift guideline? How do you keep holiday gifts from getting out of hand? Any Christmas morning magic tricks?
P.S. — I forgot about the stockings! Santa also fills the stockings with inexpensive, practical stuff my family will use up, like socks and underwear, lib balm and body wash, or arts and crafts supplies.
We tend to get a LOT of books for Christmas, so now the books are our only stocking stuffers. I love that tradition, especially since it means that we don’t have to wrap the books :). Of course, I have to buy my own chapstick now, but it’s worth it!
I love my friend’s tradition: Santa brings the underwear and socks, and mom & dad give the fun toys. She can’t see why Santa should get the credit for the fun stuff! Another friend has each child choose an item for the family pantry/food storage, and it’s wrapped up for them under the tree as one of their gifts.
We always go to the beach on the late afternoon of Christmas eve and roast hot dogs. We write the year in the sand and take a picture if the kids in front of it. When we get home, we shake the sand off, take a bath and get the PJ’s ( this year the theme for all the cousins is superheros– so not always tradiotional holiday ones). We don’t have a system in terms of who gets what, but we do make sure that only one or two things is going to stick around.. The rest needs to be disposable in nature ( art supplies that get used, or thi g’s that can disappear by Feb). It keeps the clutter down.
Lots of great ideas here.
So many good ideas! Our daughter is two, and last year we started the tradition that every Christmas morning we wake up in our house, just the three of us (and dog) and we stay in PJs for hours. I love the idea of new PJs for everyone on Christmas Eve, and the read, write, play gifts. Perfect.
In our house Santa only brings one fun gift (in Santa wrapping paper) and a stocking with some small fun stuff. The other gifts are from mom and dad and each other, and we play a game to open the gifts. This makes the gift opening take longer and more special. Although it makes the time to wrap take longer! What we do:
I use a few different wrapping papers and gather different ribbons and bows and adornments. I don’t necessarily stick to traditional Christmas colors and wrapping styles, almost anything goes!
Every gift is wrapped a little differently and I write up a short description of the wrapping of each gift along with the gift recipient’s name. Examples:
Sally – red and white Christmas words with a bright green bow
Bobby – jumping reindeer wound with red string
Jack – jingle bells topped with sparkly silver ribbon
Jill – jumping reindeer with pink and white curly ribbon
All of these descriptions are typed up in Word – one line for each description, then I cut each strip out, fold them up, and put them in some sort of Christmas container (bucket, stocking, mug). On Christmas morning the youngest picks out of the container and reads the slip. The person whose name is chosen then searches for his or her gift under the tree and opens it for all to see. When done, that person then picks a slip and the gift hunting/finding/unwrapping continues until all the slips and gifts are gone.
Some work up front, but we all so much enjoy this! And I wrap most every gift individually. My kids enjoy this activity as much as the gifts themselves! And unwrapping gifts at our house on Christmas morning takes quite a while.
We also do those same 3 gifts, but they’re “from” the 3 Wise Men because I don’t do Santa (never have–that’s a whole nother topic!). The “camels” also leave a couple family gifts on the back porch to open later in the day when more diversion is needed (usually a puzzle and a board game). Nothing extra from the parents, that’s it from us (plus pjs the night before, and stockings, which end up being way too full!). If not making gifts, my kids like to shop for each other at the dollar store or DI, which is perfect for their budgets.
We take turns opening one at a time, youngest to oldest. One thing we particularly like is that the first gift always opened on Christmas morning, even before running to stockings, is a beautiful gift box (the same one every year). This is where the first Monday of December we had all put our “gifts to the Christ child” (everyone’s notes where we had each written what we were going to do better that month), so that the kids remember what we’re really celebrating.
Joyeux Noel!
Our daughters are teenagers now, but we still have one big gift (unwrapped) from Santa plus the stockings are from him. Other gifts are from mom and dad and they get each other a gift. Usually each girl gets three gifts from us plus the one from her sister. At my parents house, they get gifts as well (only grandkids) but at my in-laws we all draw names because the family is so large.
Such a great thread! I am all about the magic of the morning! Lights, music, coffee, hot chocolate and the smell of coffee cake or cinnamon buns baking in the oven. Santa leaves one “big” gift unwrapped and the rest are from mom/dad/family.
My twins have a fall birthday so they just got loads of new stuff and my youngest has his birthday in January right after Christmas. I need advice on how to get the parents and extended family to scale it back at Christmas. There is only so much stuff we can take in during a 4 month period. It honestly makes me a bit nuts. I am a “less is more” kind of person but that does not seem to be the prevailing philosophy of our parents, aunts and uncles. It all seems like overkill and wasteful. Any advice?
On Gifts: We have started the habit of asking grandparents and aunts/uncles to give experience gifts for our kids in lieu of toys, etc. This could be a ticket to the zoo, aquairum, museum or theme park. Our closest friends have gotten into it as well. As much as our kids love toys, we have a small house and not enough room. We found that we were quickly running out of space and not loving all of the wonderful toys so much. I have found that my oldest daughter loves this idea the most. It means a movie trip with a favorite Aunt, a day at Six Flags that might not have happened (that place is so expensive) or a really cool journey to a special event at the aquarium. We are lucky to live in a big city with lots of activities within an hours driving distance. Maybe that will help? It gives us an opportunity to do more as a family b/c tickets/fees to some of these places get pretty pricey fairly quickly. Hope that helps!
oh us too! we live in a tiny house with seven people. I say they just cant have those ‘big’ toys that the stores love to get kids to want!
We had the only grandchildren for years, and with four kids the number of new things coming in between Nov- Dec (three Nov birthdays!) was nuts.
I started buying very few new fall/ winter clothes for the kids and asking the grandmas to help in that area, giving them book lists, ideas for craft supplies, and suggesting magazine subscriptions that were age/ interest appropriate. Both sets of grandparents now give the kids money for their birthdays and save the gifts for Christmas.
My kids are now 10- 22yo, and it has worked really well!
We went the experience route and the magazine route on the Christmas presents (family pass to the zoo, Nat Geo for kids, Cricket, etc.) from the grandparents and aunts/uncles, etc. One set of grandparents wasn’t thrilled with the idea so we asked them to split their budget in half and use half for a toy (their preferred gift) and either do a gift card or cash in an envelope with the rest to be used specifically for some toy or whatever in about June so the kids could get outdoor fun stuff since their birthdays are right after Christmas. The kids are happy since they can get things for summer, I’m happy because I’m not paying for them and the grandparents are happy because they get an excited phone call (and a nice thank-you note) when the money get spent telling just how it was used.
We decided to do things a bit differently this year, because we have been tired of all the *stuff*. The kids are making a list of the things they want the most. Then they pick ONE gift out and pick the ONE person that they want to give them that gift. So they will ask us (mom and dad) for one thing, Nana and Grampy for one thing, etc. They have had to be more choosy about what is truly important to them, which we are hoping will emphasize the spirit of giving more than how much they get.
As for Santa, he’s on a drastically reduced budget this year (times are hard for everyone ;) and the wear/read/want/need thing is looking pretty good for the gifts. The stockings will have small things – lip balm, a few chocolates or small treats they aren’t usually allowed to have (LOVE the banned cereal idea!!)…
Oh, and they always get one new ornament to put on the tree. Mom and dad pick it out, based on interests from the past year. They are dated and hung on the tree Christmas Eve. We will probably adopt the new PJ’s idea this year that they can wear to open their new ornament, since they’ve grown so much :)
I read somewhere (internet brain fatigue!) that the small, stocking things (PJs, book, craft supplies, etc.) should be from Santa and the big Christmas items (eg. bike, trampoline, toy) should be from Mum & Dad. And that the decision to purchase expensive items like these should become part of the family’s conversation, so that kids become aware about the budgeting decisions that need to be made. And theoretically, will then grow up to be better money managers, and that lovely big expensive things won’t just turn up by magic, but via hard work on behalf of their parents. Mine are just 4 & 3, so we haven’t really gotten into the discussion about this yet, though. Still thinking it over!
When my oldest, now 19, was a baby we put a limit on what we could spend. At that time it was $20 to fill his stocking. My husband and I each had $10 to spend. What we bought (or Made) was a surprise for each other… that was the real gift. Babies don’t know any different! We have continued with no presents under the tree. All the gifts come on Christmas morning, in and out of the stocking. Everything wrapped. It works for us. My kids are now 15, 17, 19. In the early years we didn’t get presents ourselves. We just preferred to give to the kids what ever we could. It became clear to us though that we were setting them up to become wee princes and princess. We then made sure there were gifts for Mom and Dad on Christmas morning too.
I tend to go a little overboard at Christmas! We don’t buy the kids very many “things” throughout the year so I feel a little justified by spoiling them at Christmas. :) Santa gifts are not wrapped and include slippers, jammies and two or three toys. The stockings are filled to the hilt from Santa as well (usually a dvd, smalls games, candy, playing cards, lip gloss). The rest comes from mom and dad. I do the mood setting too. We only have two children so saving up for the holidays isn’t quite so daunting.
I really enjoy reading everyone’s traditions.
~Jill
We are the same way. Our kids don’t get much throughout the year and they don’t ask for much either. They know to save it up for Christmas/Birthdays. We wanted to teach them that they don’t need a new toy on every trip we make to the store and it worked!
Growing up, my parents made Christmas magical by starting our celebration early in the month. We had a 15 piece Nativity set that we put out piece by piece one night at a time, starting with Mary & Joseph. Baby Jesus, however was saved until the very last night, and “Santa” always brought Him on Christmas Eve. My mother was much like you, Gabby, and made sure the lights were on and things were staged so that it really was a magical Christmas morning — no matter how many gifts we received. We’ve carried the Nativity tradition on with our own 6 children. This is the first year we’ll be doing a hard and fast 3-gift tradition, but all our children are excited about it (they range from 15-2). Here’s hoping for another magical Christmas season.
Growing up my sister and I always found our presents from Father Christmas on the hearth as he had to come down the chimney to get into the house :) We’d have one main one each and then also our stockings that he’d leave on the end of our beds that included little useful things but always some gold coins and a satsuma in the toe. He always had time to eat the mince pie and drink the whisky we left out for him, too, and take the carrot and milk for Rudolph! Our parents would give us one main present each and a few small ones under the tree – all other presents from family, friends etc went under the tree, too – and then there were a couple of little ones on the tree for Boxing Day as they liked to spread it out a bit and not let us have too much at once.
I tell my kids that christmas is the whole month of december. I had fantastic christmas as a child, but I remember (probably around 12 years old) just often feeling underwelmed with the day (I mean all most people do is eat and sit around) so over the years we’ve developed a lot of traditions
We set out our nativity sets on the first of december
We set up our tree on the first FHE in december
We have wrapped christmas books and read one each night in december
We sleep under our tree one night in december (usually when school gets out which is 2nd week in december in australia – for the SUMMER holiday)
We do gingerbread houses
We watch christmas movies (maybe one a week)
We have a Grandparents Christmas Dinner (the Monday night before Christmas) where we invite both sets of grandparents over and do the whole baked dinner thing (unusual in very hot australia) so the kids can have the grandparents to themselves and not have to share with cousins
We usually have a few advents going on for the whole month (some years treat ones, some years have slips of paper with activities to do for each day) and I love paper lift the flap advents!
We sew a ‘christmas pillow case’ out of christmas fabric so the kids have ‘good christmas dreams’ each night in november/december
We do a service for a charity or person
We do Advent (the four candles, with a spiritual thought, sing a carol) which is each sunday leading up to Christmas day so this usually starts the last sunday in November
To me these things equal christmas not just the gifts given on christmas day and I try to constantly instill this in my children. I really do tell them all the time that Christmas is the whole month of December, not just the 25th :)
Oh and for presents.. all presents come from us, we dont really do santa. Our first child knew instinctively by 3 years old santa wasnt real and told us so, so we’ve never really bothered :)
We learned from a family in NY to do three gifts for each child, just like Jesus received three gifts.
It give us a chance to talk about why we celebrate Christmas and how we want them to be just like Jesus.
They all come from us, our kids never really got into Santa (they are 6 and 4) but they find him fun and part of Christmas either way.
My husband is American and I am from South America so, when we go to visit my family we don’t do any presents, our present is to be able to go and see them, and the kids have never miss the “opening” of the presents.
I like it because we can think more of the Spiritual meaning of it all.
We did one big thing and a stocking from Santa when the kids were small. Both kids’ birthdays are right after Christmas (within 2 weeks) so each kid would get 1 present from us and then the rest of the fill was from grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. Their birthdays were the presents from us. We didn’t really promote Santa much and last year the youngest (6) informed us that he didn’t exist and her present came from us. I told her that Santa was more of an idea of doing something nice for someone else and since she now knew the secret she was officially old enough to become Santa for someone else. Both kids were quite taken with the idea and it’s become the focus now. (Yes, they still get one gift from Santa, but they pretty much pick it out now – they have a dollar limit)
i think that i’ve won out on most of the christmas traditions because my husband is so easy going. stockings are filled with the practical and from santa and we get credit for the few other gifts that we do give to our kids. they always get a book and then a couple little toys.
we are young and poor students, so that has dictated some of the frugality of christmas, but i am surprised at how much i enjoy the simplicity of it and we will be sticking with it throughout the years. i also feel like doing it that way makes it easier to justify buying things that they need throughout the year. especially because we have lots of winter birthdays in our family.
my first daughter was actually born on christmas, so that has added a couple of unexpected traditions to our christmas celebrations. she always has a bunch of balloons tied to her stocking from santa because he knows that it is her birthday. we do christmas in the morning and then after the christmas morning let down and an early christmas dinner, we switch into birthday mode. we may have to adjust as she gets older, but so far it has been great and she loves having her birthday on christmas. plus it makes the entire day a great celebration.
also, i agree with a previous commenter that i would rather put effort into doing fun activities throughout the christmas season that make the whole month special and remind us of the real meaning of christmas. then christmas day just becomes the cherry on top.
We had gifts from Santa as well as our parents, as kids. As far back as I can remember, my mom and dad would hide one or two “big” gifts for us to search for after all the gifts under the tree were opened. “The Hunt” is what we call it. My dad would write little riddles to help us locate our gift (which were hidden somewhere in the house), we’d find it, bring it back and open it up.
At some point over the 30+ years we have done this, it has developed into a song riddle. Now my dad writes riddles “to the tune of…” (all Beach Boys songs, or Bob Dylan songs, or Christmas songs, etc.) and we have to sing the riddle in front of the family. It embarassing for us all, but so much fun. Us kids are all grown now with kids of our own, but it’s not Christmas without “The Hunt!”
I realize that I probably sound totally out of it, but I had no idea that so many people give their kids gifts from “Santa”. It’s interesting to me! At our house, I try to keep the focus on the giving for the kids (they save allowance, choose or make a gift and get very excited about giving) and surprise them with something fun that they didn’t think they would get (plus books). I have a hard time limiting myself every time I think of something else I think they would love. :)
We used to travel a lot when I was younger, and my mom would collect souvenirs along the way and then use those in our stockings from Santa. So we’d have pencils, erasers, wind-up toys, pins or little things from all the different places we’d been that year. That was always kind of neat for me, so I’ve started doing that with my boys now.
As we got older our stockings still had stuff from our travels, but we also started to get really nice stuff, like expensive make-up sets. Now, the stockings at my Mom’s house have just as nice presents as the ones under the tree!
Also, when we were younger, on Christmas morning, Santa would have left foot prints (just footprints cut out of black construction paper) and a little it of glitter all over the living room, leading back to the fireplace.
Another thing I do with my oldest son (he’s 5 this year) is make reindeer food to leave out with the milk and cookies for Santa. We usually just fill up a cellophane bag with dry cereal, random seasonings like oregano and parsley, baby carrots, rice and sometimes grass from outside. Then we attach a tag indicating that it’s for the reindeer. In the morning, my son loved seeing all the food that the “reindeer” dropped on the ground outside our house as they flew away with Santa.
For us the Advent season starts in the beginning of December, so we set up our Nativity set and I also started the tradition of opening a wrapped Christmas book each night. Each year I add to our collection when the Christmas books go on clearance after the holiday.
We don’t “do” Santa Claus, but we did “read, wear, play, share” last year and this year we’ll be adding “watch” to the list as well. :) This has worked out wonderfully for us since our budget is very small. We try to do Christmas for the 4 of us for under $200 and then gifts for other family members around $150. Thankfully our families on either side are small, and our parents really love getting a calendar with photos of the kids! :)
I think my favorite tradition from growing up was that Santa hid the stockings. It came from my mother’s family. Maybe Swedish? I’m not positive. We’d all go down as a family (so we had to wait until mom and dad got up) and go to a room (the one without the Christmas tree in it) and search for the stockings. Usually there were practical things, a book and a small toy along with some nuts and candy.
As far as Santa/parent gifts: Once we’d have our fill of our stockings we’d move together as a family to the room with the tree. There we’d have our “Santa present” which was one big thing. A bike, dollhouse, technology or something; whatever was applicable to that child. then we’d have one or two gifts from mom and dad that were usually clothes under the tree. Worked fine for us.
In general “Santa” wasn’t really a big deal. By the time we were all 5-7 years old we knew that “Santa” was mom and dad anyway even if we still call them Santa gifts. You knew who to thank and who put whatever it was under the tree.
Change of subject ! What adorable ornaments .
I’ll preface this by saying I have no children and that to me, Santa was just one of the loveliest part of Christmas. I was a very dreamy child and still honestly believed in Santa in my teens simply because my parents would never, ever buy me such extravagant. I never acknowledged that Santa didn’t exist. It simply faded from view and I knew that the gift tags my mother jokingly signed “Santa” were the very special holiday gifts. A lot of people find this strange, but I love that Christmas for me was as magical at 13 and 14 as it was when I was 6 and 7.
I say this because I never really considered how Santa Claus affects a child beyond the lovely idea until I came in contact with our neighbours. I’m loathe to judge anyone for their parenting techniques, especially when – like I said – I don’t have children or the pressures of being a parent, but this family chose not to use the Santa myth at all with their young children. It’s simply a Christmas story. Totally their choice. But their children are very demanding and entitled all year around, since they know they’ll get presents from their parents – and are genuinely ungrateful when they receive any sort of gift. It’s from seeing this that I realised the idea of Santa helped me develop a conscience and sort of a code of ethics as a child. Mum might not be watching but Santa certainly was; that I was owed nothing from my parents, but earned them with continued good behaviour no matter where I was. It’s quite strange to see Santa as a teaching device, but I really think he is.
My family’s Christmas is still quite large and magical despite the fact that my sister and I are university students. We get several items that we desperately want (such as consoles and games, electronics etc) and many things we need (stationary for university, socks and underwear, hairbrushes, even textbooks). My mother was very strict when I was younger and the only things I received outside of my birthday and Christmas was books I bought with my own pocket money, and this added to the magic of Christmas. It’s absolutely something I plan to use in the distant future when I do have children because I think that the world has lost a lot of its magic. And if I can recapture that by individually wrapping half a dozen pair of underwear or notebooks for school and label them ‘Love Santa’, I’d do it in a heart-beat :)
On a different note, what are you opinions on electronics? Do your older kids ask for iPods, phones and DS consoles? And you must be SO excited for a French Christmas. It would just be a dream come true :)
My husband and I are not HUGE on Santa, but wanted the kids to enjoy the childhood magic of the season. We are Christians and wanted more of a focus on the real meaning of Christmas and on giving and thankfulness. In our house, Santa fills stockings. My mother in law made them and they are gorgeous and large. Santa brings good dark chocolate (the only kind my kids like, but also what my husband loves so it will be used gradually over the next few months), new toothbrushes, lip balm, dvds (amazon has all kinds of specials this time of year and I also buy them throughout the year so each child has one – Veggie tales, Disney, science, etc.) practical small toys – lego minifigures, etc. All other presents are from Mom and Dad or grandparents, relatives, etc. I wanted the children to appreciate who the gifts were coming from. I didn’t want all presents arriving from a mysterious person they could not thank in person. In my husband’s family, every present came from Santa – but I wanted my kids to enjoy giving and being thankful. It took a little explaining with my mother in law, but she now sees it my way. It works for us.
I love the idea that Santa just brings three gifts! When I have kids, I’m totally doing this, because, frankly, I don’t want to raise materialistic little shits like myself.
Also, my mom did (and still does) the same thing with stockings and I LOVE the practical stuff. Shaving cream and socks are so good to have handy during the year to come!
Each night from Thanksgiving – Christmas the kids get a festive story that I read to them before bed. On Christmas Eve we do the pajamas tradition. Me and my Husband wake up at 6(on Christmas morn.) to make festive hot chocolate (complete with whipped cream, a candy cane and shaved chocolate), turn on all the holiday lights around the house and retrieve both the still photo and video camera’s as to capture our every move(not literally) on the most wonderful day of the year, and turn on soft festive melody’s. Also, because the day is being captured by cams, we normally(still in our pjs of course :) make sure our hair is at its best (me especially…lol) and our faces are washed and ready to roll (we don’t shower on Christmas morning….but instead we shower/bathe the littlees on Christmas Eve). At around 6:58ish we turn on the cams preparing for the stampede of kids rushing downstairs (they aren’t allowed to come down until 7). We take pics/videos of them running to the family room with their stockings in hand (we put the stockings at the foot of their beds to give us some extra time to get things ready)and then our famous Christmas on the stairs photo(which we use as our Christmas card pic the next year), we hand all 4 of our girls (plus ourselves) hot chocolate’s (the hotcho’s are good because it gives the kids enough sugar/energy to get through the morning without breakfast)and tell/show eachother the gifts we got in our stockings (unwrapped gifts from fun characters like Rudolph, frosty the snowman and Mrs Clause…we tell the kids that Santa told Mommy to tell them not to tell there friends about Rudolph etc filling their stockings as it disrupts his toy workshop…I know it’s not true but the kids enjoy saying things like “Daddy guess what, Mr Gingerbread man got me a yo-yo”….they find it fun so as long as they’re happy I’m happy…btw we have 4 girls: 21, 16, 10 & 5 ). The kids each open their (main) gift that year(the thing they asked Santa for) and that satisfy’s them until after lunch. Lunch is served at mid-day and consists of Chicken or Turkey, Glazed Ham, Sweet Potato, Potato(cooked so that they’re beautiful and crunchy), Stuffing and gravy oh and peas! Dessert consists of Pomegranate, Strawberry and Passionfruit topped Pavlova with cream, Fruit Mince Tart-lets, Brandy Snaps and Eggnog…delish! By this time it’s normally pushing 2. Then we gather around the tree and the kids open 3 gifts from us (also to represent the 3 wise men giving baby Jesus 3 gifts) and all the gifts from friends and relatives…and their siblings! We take turns opening gifts and (we each get a new journal in our stocking’s every year) we each jot down the gifts we received and who they are from.
I hope you enjoyed reading about me and my Family’s Christmas day traditions…I know the question above isn’t ‘What are your Family’s Christmas day traditions’ …lol…but I figured there would be some people who would’ve loved reading this :)
Also: Santa leaves 1 gift for the whole family to open on the 26th (usually a boardgame etc ;).
How refreshing to see other countries’ traditions. :)
I am completely against lying to my children as I was absolutely devastated when Santa “died” from my life. For us, the birth of Jesus Christ is the purpose for celebrating and Christmas is precious to me.
I’m brokenhearted to see how greedy, demanding, and ungrateful children have become so I fight this with everything in me. I am trying to open my children’s eyes to the world around them and encourage them to give gifts to Jesus by our giving to children in other countries – poor and orphaned or those persecuted because of their faith in Jesus. We give Christmas away all year round. :) I love it.
This year we will have a book to open and read each night in December as well as follow our Advent reading using the Jesse Tree/ornaments. We also paint Nativity scene ornaments we make each year for the regular tree.
We have stockings for each child to get toothbrushes, socks, undies, oranges, gum, and little plastic toys – dinos or trucks,etc. from big sisters (we have 10 with 8 at home).
Then we have one main together gift – i.e, this year will be one big set of legos – for my four little boys/2 year old girl (I got at a garage sale for $15 – HUGE set.) One family game to play Christmas Day. A homemade Noah’s Ark pull toy (made by Daddy) and cute felt animals (made by big sisters) for the toddler sister. I’m still working on what to do for my three teen girls – a book or art supply for each, likely. That’s it.
I tied strings to their toes that they followed inside and outside to find their gifts last year to bring back to the tree to open. I have had them follow clues, too – I always try to find creative ways like this and they NEVER miss the Santa “magic” because I work hard to give them “mama magic”. I have found the special spirit of joy and love and fun together as a family is SO much more important than fake Santa and material junk to throw away later, get bored with, or fight over later, anyhow. :)
We have a special breakfast by candlelight and a Christmas Eve dinner together, too, with carols by candlelight each night in December before bed. Each week during Advent, on Sunday, I’m having them draw each other’s names and they will give a gift of service that week to whomever they draw and try to do it without the receiver discovering who it was. (make a bed, do an assigned chore, clean something,etc.) The goal is to give these “secret gifts” to each other each week and make it to Christmas without anyone figuring out their givers and then Christmas Day discover who they all were. With 8 children and Mama and Daddy – 10 people spending a month sneaking around with little acts of kindness up our sleeves, looking for the just right time to give it . . . it just doesn’t get much better. :)
I’m telling you – get brave and take the plunge to change your focus. Jesus Christ makes all the difference in the world and in our home. We carry that love all year long in the midst of the normal buzz of activity in a family our size. :)
I put all I’ve got into making this the “most wonderful time of the year” and spending money on stuff is the least special part of it, honestly. Making and giving has become their focus with gifts and, let me tell you, it is priceless in this country consumed with “stuff” overflowing houses with empty, broken hearts and lives often barely tolerating each other the rest of the year.
They are never lied to, and they are embracing the gift of compassion as we shop and fill shoe boxes for poor children through Operation Christmas Child, send gifts to orphans we support all year,etc.
Thanks for the reply :)
I absolutely agree on Jesus being the true meaning of Christmas(make that the true meaning of life), so I am sorry for the wrong impression. I am praying about my worldliness and am gradually improving on that holiday aspect!
We give 1 gift from us on Christmas Eve and Christmas day and our house is ALL Santa. I am not allowed to buy ANY clothes for my step daughter as a gift, because at her mom’s house.. it seems her little brother is the favorite and he gets tons of toys but she is stuck with a few outfits. I made a promise to myself that I would never do that. She’s only 7 and a really outstanding kid. It breaks my heart to see her so sad, not getting what she asked for there every year. Last year it was an innotab.. I bought one and her mom told me she bought one too so I took mine back. On Christmas day.. Lo and behold.. no innotab. This year will be different!!!! We have full custody now and Christmas WILL be amazing for that little girl! Lots of love and holiday spirit here!
However, we will be doing Christmas PJs on Christmas Eve for everyone as a gift from Santa’s reindeer. :)
I just Love Christmas & Santa! We keep our Christmas pretty small & simple, but what works for us is this: Christmas Eve they get to open one present which already labeled for EVE from mom & dad..it is ALWAYS new PJ’s. (I pre-wash them because they want to wear them for Santa). Santa fills the stockings & leaves their “fun” gift. I have 2 girls 20 months apart so usually it is gifts that can be used together or shared well with a note from Santa with how proud he is that they share & play together (baby dolls with furniture/stroller…one year it was paints & markers with easel) Santa is ALL fun with one special outfit or those boots they have been begging for! Mommy & daddy get them the always needed socks/undies & maybe a new book. We keep it pretty simple. Our GREATEST part of Christmas morning (for me anyway) is the tradition of my homemade ooey gooey cinnamon rolls for breakfast & reading about the birth of Jesus Christ out of the Bible! My girls are 3 & 5 but already “Know” this tradition & look forward to it. Don’t stress it & DON’T Over due or you will find yourself having to outdo you each year as they grow!! errrrr, Santa I mean!
I forgot to add that we always make a birthday cake for Jesus & sing him Happy Birthday on Christmas Morning, my husband & I make Santa about the kids (& CHRISTmas about Jesus’ Birthday). We tell them that Santa is for boys & girls not big people. We don’t really exchange gifts as we are tight on budget as well as so many other families. My husband & I get our joy watching the girls. We might get each other 1 small gift, last year I gave him a parallel bible to help in his bible studies & I got got my favorite new book to read!
I have put a lot of thought into this and decided to focus on Saint Nicholas on December 6th – his feast day so that Christmas can just be about Jesus. On the eve of St. Nicholas day we gather old clothes or toys for the goodwill. Then that night, the kids put out their shoes and in the morning they find chocolate and candycanes and a new book – usually about Christmas. Then we take our items to the goodwill and that evening have popcorn, st. Nicholas cookies and hot cocoa and watch a movie. The giving away helps keep with the spirit of St. Nicholas and it makes room for the things they will get for Christmas.
On Christmas Eve, after mass, everyone comes home to the adorned and lit up tree (for the first time that month – since the light of the world has come.) We put baby Jesus in the crib. The next morning the gifts are under the tree when the kids wake up and over the next twelve days – we slowly open them and do fun family events. it concludes with Epiphany when the wiseman brought their gifts to baby Jesus with a final gift. Also, on each of the twelve days of Christmas kids may open a gift like – art supplies, a new book, a toy, but there aren’t twelve gifts like that! Some days they open a coupon to go ice skating or a coupon to make Christmas cookies or a coupon to go on a hike.
I have always done every gift being from santa. Christmas presents for our family weren’t from parents, only santa. On christmas eve the kids see presents from other people and a few from parents and they open one but every Gift on Christmas was dropped off by santa around midnight. And usually I have a bear with the year on it as a collectors from mommy on christamas eve and santa moves it somewhere silly in the house and he leaves letters for the kids with each being different and showing some of each personailty in it and a joke or two. A lot of times santa complains that the milk was a little warm lol and his boot prints are left on the carpet. Simply made with a paper cut out with a sole and a flat part with carpet fresh put in the fridge and sprinkled over the cut out leaving santas prints. And if you don’t have a fireplace cut a piece of red cloth and stick it in the window and mention in a note that santa accidentally cut ripped his suit on the window.
In our household santa brings christmas eve pjs and a colouring book and pens (was the same when I was growing up), my son is bathed at 6.30pm on christmas eve then dressed into his fresh new pjs we then eat a little christmas eve feast of cookies, sandwiches and fries leaving a cookie and glass of milk for santa and a carrot for each reindeer, we have our feast while watching a christmas movie, we then do some colouring by the christmas tree, at 9pm my son hops into bed and goes to sleep, then santa arrives at 1am, first he visits my sons bedroom to hang his stocking on the outside of his bedroom door, inside the stocking there is socks, undies, bath bombs, soap, a toothbrush, a small toy, a 3ds game or a dvd, a satsuma, and some coloured tissue paper, glitter, and a hand writen note from santa. Santa’s elves leave one present on the top of the stairs for my son signed Santa’s Elves, this is usually a toy car , down stairs the christmas lights glisten, soft christmas songs play in the background, the table is filled with breakfast and a hand written note from santa is left by the cookie crumbs and empty glass thanking us for leaving him a special key to enter our home (breakfast Is from santa as a gift to thank us for our hospitality), then at 8am a special letter stamped ‘the north pole” drops through the letter box my son gets so excited by this, this letter leaves him little clues on where to find his first present (usually clothing) once he’s found his first present there’s a knock at the door and an ho ho ho can be heard from the other side, once the door is opened in steps santa, he sits my son on his lap and give him his second present from his sack this will be one of the gifts my son wants the most, then santa will tell him he’s left some presents at other family members households for my son, we then visit the in laws for dinner and my son finds more presents from santa there same with other family members, then at 7pm we make sure we are back home my son is taken up stairs for a bath and put in yet more new fresh pjs that are left waiting on the bathroom cabinet, then he’s taken downstairs and met by the ultimate gift (one he really really really wants) this year it will be a bike, then we watch a christmas film or play a family board game, then my son goes to bed to find his stocking refilled with fruit and cookies for midnight snacks, he abso loves it and almost every present he gets including off relatives are signed ‘santa’ or ‘elves’
I celebrate christmas a little different to when I was a child, on the evening of 30th november (my daughter’s birthday) we put our tree up while playing christmas music, then my daughters put to bed, on 1st december there is an advent calender, a letter to santa set for her to write her letter to santa, and there’s a small toy and a letter from the advent angels reminding her that santa is watching and to be a good girl etc, on christmas eve the elves deliver a present which is left by the fire in glittery wrapping paper signed ‘elves’ inside is a pair of pyjamas and a letter reminding her to leave a cookie and glass of milk for santa and a carrot for each reindeer, then she’s bathed and put to bed, at 12pn her stocking is filled with head bands, princess tiara, a little make up set, fruit, some chocolate, a dvd, a cheap toy, and a pound, then I organise the room to look as magical as possible and tip toe to bed leaving her stocking at the bottom of her bed, I set my alarm for 6am and sneak down the stairs to put some soft christmas musc on, turn the tree lights on, warm the fire and make the breakfast, my daughter is woken up at 8am to open her stocking then I take her downstairs were we admire the footsteps santa has left and find the half eaten cookie and half drank milk and nibbled carrots, then we eat breakfast and then she digs into her sack which is left under the tree :)
I grew up as one of 6 kids and we had many yearly traditions that contributed to the magic of Christmas. On Christmas Eve we always decorated the tree and then had the same supper – a roast ham with pineapple slices, scalloped potatoes, corn, and maybe some other vegetable, and it was the one day a year we were allowed to eat supper in front of the TV. We would spread an old sleeping bag on the floor and all sit on it with our plates and watch “A Christmas Carol” with Alistair Sim. Then my dad would read the Nativity and say a prayer of blessing over the tree and we would plug in the lights for the first time! Then we went to church where we were all choirgirls/boys and that was always a huge part of the “magic” for me, especially when the lights would go out and we sang “Silent Night” by candlelight.
When we woke up on Christmas morning, our stockings had appeared on our beds by our feet and they were always full of chocolates and little things like hair clips/lip balms/socks etc with an enormous orange in the toe of the stocking and a red delicious apple at the top. The stockings were the only things from Santa Claus, and then we usually got a gift from parents, and gifts from grandparents, aunts/uncles, siblings etc. My dad always had to sing another church service on Christmas morning that was men’s choir only (and later my brothers joined him when their voices had broken) so we were never allowed to open presents until after lunch (usually sandwiches with the leftover ham from Christmas Eve). We would sit at home and watch It’s a Wonderful Life (one of my absolute favourite movies!) in the meantime. Sometimes this felt like torture, to have the presents sitting there under the tree and not be allowed to touch them, but one has to be patient to participate in present opening in my family! Even when the time came, we would open the presents one by one, each member of the family taking turns so that we can all see and admire each others’ gifts (and thank the gift-giver, if he/she is present!). This tradition comes from my mum’s family. She was apparently appalled the first time she spent Christmas with my dad’s family and they all tore into their gifts at once! I think our way makes gift-giving extra special and we’re always talking and laughing with each other throughout!
What do you folks do regarding breakfast? When we were kids our parents let us eat the oranges and treats from our stocking until we were ill! With us, we haven’t figured out if we just serve pastries for its ease or wait until later to have more of a brunch? But, then it’s almost turkey time…A good problem to have but it would be good to have a simple tradition that gets everyone fed while enjoying the unwrapping ;)
My LO is 2.5 and we haven’t quite established any traditions yet but I like the read, wear, play. I tend to go way overboard on gift buying. She is an only child so I figure why not let santa spoil her rotten while she is too young to know the difference. The first two or three Christmases are more for us parents anyways. this will be the first year she grasps the concept of Santa so I’m trying to find some good ideas of how to set up Santa’s gifts. As a kid my dad always left them unwrapped strewn all across the living room but with her being so young I’d like to do something kind of creative and fun. Any ideas?
I have a 9 year old and an 8 year old. At our house each child gets 10 presents. Each present has a number on it so they have fun digging through and finding their number 1, number 2…..etc with their name on it. They take turns opening one present at a time so everyone watches the others open their presents. Everything comes from mom and dad except the one present from Santa that is the one thing they asked him for. They open that one last. We always have Christmas music playing and make cookies for Santa the night before. We don’t have any family close by so all the presents come from us.
We also have a tradition on Christmas Eve of watching the Santa tracker on NORAD so they can see where he’s at and make sure they’re in bed on time. The night before Christmas we also read the Christmas story in the bible, set out the nativity scene and say a prayer together.
In my family, Santa would fill the stockings and bring one (or biggest best) gift (unwrapped with a giant bow on it for maximum excitement entering the living room Christmas morning).
In my husband’s family, every single gift came from Santa. There’d be no presents under the tree and then Santa would bring tons.
I hate it. And he hates my way. So we meet somewhere in the middle with Santa bringing about half the gifts. But it’s still an argument between us each year as we both like our way better.
Then later that day…
My mother in law shows up with so many gifts, enough to fill our living room and stocking of her own. I’m cringing inside every year when she shows up. Not because we aren’t good friends, but because I think grandparents should only bring a couple gifts and no stockings.
Growing up we got fun toys from Santa and he also filled our stockings. Mom and dad would give more boring stuff such as pajamas, candy.
Santa also brought his helper the ‘Christmas mouse’ with him down the chimney every year. This was my moms way of giving us (3 kids) something to open and play with together. It was typically a board game or a video game.