By Gabrielle. Image by Lindsey Johnson for Design Mom.
I’ve got a question for you today. It’s pretty light-hearted, but I’m genuinely curious. Have you ever deliberately tried to change a harmless dislike into a like?
I’ve mentioned before I’m not a fan of cilantro. Not a big deal, I know. The same is true of a measurable section of the population — cilantro tastes like soap to some people. But I read an article about a foodie who conquered all his food dislikes (I swear I’ve linked to it before, but now I can’t find it!), and it really stuck with me. Then I read a status update from my friend, Laurie Smithwick. She’s also a cilantro hater, but decided she wasn’t going to be anymore.
I was really impressed by that, and thought it would be smart to follow her example. So I’ve been doing my best to not avoid cilantro for the past many months. In France, we rarely if ever encountered cilantro, but here in Oakland, it’s practically impossible to stay away from it — at least if you’re a fan of Mexican food (which I am!).
The results of my non-avoidance? So far, I still can’t say I’m a cilantro lover, but I am a cilantro tolerator, and I hope I’m on the road to being a cilantro embracer.
But.
I’ve tried the same thing with purple, and have had less luck. In 4th and 5th grade, purple was my absolute favorite color — every shade, but particularly pastel. Purple clothes, purple pencil box, purple barrettes! But somewhere between age 10 and now, I lost my love for that regal color and even began to really dislike it. If it’s greyed out and sort of a dove shade, I’m fine. But true purples are not my thing.
A few weeks ago, I was thinking about how arbitrary my lack of love for purple was, and that I was no doubt missing out on some true beauty in the world by automatically dismissing anything purple, so I’ve been attempting to be more open-minded about it. When a purple option is presented to me, I’ll spend more time with it, and run a little dialogue in my head about how purple is a perfectly good color and that it’s worth liking.
I’ll be honest, I’ve seen a little movement on my purple-loving scale, but nothing impressive.
It’s made me wonder about your own experiences with changing your tastes and preferences. If you’ve tried, were you able to succeed? And was it worth it? Any stories about color preferences? Or flip-flopping on a particular flavor? Chime in!
P.S. — Another harmless dislike: least favorite flowers.
I dislike purple for a long time as well, but I blame it on over-saturation. My room was painted lavender. My school colors were purple and white. It was EVERYWHERE. When I went to college I mostly banned it from my life. But it slowly started to seep back in. And of course with two kids who love every color of the rainbow, and wanting to keep it that way, I have learned to tolerate pretty much any form of color.
Can’t say I’ve “taught” myself to like any foods. I disliked beets for a long time but I suspect that’s because of the way they were cooked/served. I will never like olives and I really don’t want to.
My sister pretends to be allergic to onions so people won’t make her eat them. I mourn for her. Maybe some people will mourn for me too when I say that I think beets taste like dirt. But really…BEETS TASTE LIKE DIRT. I have had them fresh from the garden, pickled…you name it. I am willing to try them, but for some readon I can’t get over it.
p.s. Was the foodie you were talking about Jeffery Steingarten? He’s the guy who judges a lot on “Iron Chef America”. He wrote a book called “The Man Who Ate Everything” about overcoming his food aversions. Maybe I need to order a copy because BEETS.
Hi Gabrielle! You may be thinking of an old essay by Vogue’s food writer, Jeffery Steingarten. It’s also the introduction to his excellent book “The Man Who Ate Everything” http://www.amazon.com/The-Man-Who-Ate-Everything/dp/0375702024
If you haven’t read it yet, I highly recommend gobbling it up as soon as possible. It often made me laugh out loud, and the food facts were fascinating.
Hi Gabrielle! Cute post… I know I often feel vague annoyance with myself regarding things I don’t like (maybe I just hate to miss out on things!) Anyway, I used to hate hate HATE olives. I’d tried them as a kid, and hated everything about them to the point where they made me slightly gaggy. But as an adult who loves good food, I felt I was missing out on something. I had gone so far as to buy a bottle of good olives recommended by a friend, but had yet to make the leap… then we were out for dinner one night and got an appetized platter that included these beautiful, fresh, fresh olives (still attached to twig and leaf), so I thought “why not?” Did I love them? No. Nonono. But I at least GOT them… there were some lovely undertones to the bitter, sour I-hate-olives taste on top. That was rather a lot of olives ago. I still don’t like grey-green olives in a jar, but lovely fresh olives are now one of my favourite things. Big fat olives in a dirty vodka martini make me pretty happy too. So keep cilantro-ing and purple-ing… I like to think it’s a wee way to keep yourself open to the whole world just a little bit more. Cheers.
When we first moved into our house the main family room was painted purple (possibly the best shade of purple in the world) and I about died. I dislike purple with a passion, nearly as much as my dislike of pink. I refused to do anything with the house until that was repainted. It’s been green ever since. The bathroom was painted blue, which was a little out of my palette but tolerable, I have since grown to love it! It could use a fresh coat of paint and I just cannot imagine it another color.
This is a great topic! I too have deliberately tried to open my mind to things that I don’t naturally gravitate toward. I have always loved browns, creams, and greens, but not yellow, so a few years ago, I tried to invite yellow into my life. Instead of rejecting yellow options in tops, purses, etc., I purposefully chose them — most of which were mustards — but now I adore the color! I think I just needed to build my own relationship with it — it sounds so silly, but it’s true. Like you, I’ve also never loved purples (and blues, which I’m still working on), but you know what? Violet looks smashing with mustard. And so, I’m evolving to adopt deep purples — especially with a little touch of red to them (I think it’s all about finding just the right shade/hue and situating it within a larger palette full of colors you do love). I have felt a little insane when I tell people I’m trying to cultivate an appreciation for yellow or purple, so I love that you think about this, too!
I use a similar method for foods I don’t love… I used to dislike cucumbers, but I spent a year trying them repeatedly, and now I’m a huge fan. It’s not always successful — I still don’t tolerate mushrooms that well — but it often does work. And I definitely feel like it’s a worthwhile exercise… my horizons are more expansive since I began trying to welcome things into my life that I wouldn’t typically choose.
I hope you come to love both cilantro and purple — and if not, at least you tried!
I just don’t like pickles. And yet everyone I love seems to LOVE pickles. So I decided almost 20 years ago I would try and like pickles. At least once a year I would get the most delicious looking pickle I could find and say “Oooo, that looks good. I know I’m going to like it.” I’d give it a good try. And every year I still end up in the same place – I just don’t like pickles.
I have a similar experience with you to the color purple. When I was 8 I had to be wearing something purple every day! It drove my mom crazy. Now I really don’t like the color. I have grown from a genuine dislike to more of a general disinterest. I would never choose it for myself, but when I see something beautiful, purple doesn’t take away from the beauty. I can recognize it’s beauty as long as I don’t have to wear it or put it in my house!
Interesting about the taste-training!
And you can’t hate purple if you’ve grown up in Brisbane, Australia, which turns purple every spring with flowering Jacarandas.
I’ve been working on strawberries. I love them in jam, especially of the homemade variety but I have a hard time with their texture when fresh. I’ve been getting better but I still can’t eat very many at once.
I’ve actually been doing the exact same thing with cilantro! I’ve never liked it, but decided that I should try not to avoid it anymore. It’s been going okay so far. I’ve also been trying the same thing with avocado. I’ve never liked it, but I want to like it. I can’t handle huge chunks of it, but a little bit mixed in with something else (like a salsa), and I’m okay.
With colours, though, the only colour I really dislike is orange, and I don’t see myself warming out to that anytime soon.
For years I have tried liking anything that is bitter. Endive, arugula, mineral water, bitter chocolate, anything that is really bitter. Mostly I would fake it to be acceptable in a restaurant or while we lived in Europe. But this year I decided I just would not eat bitter things any more. It is liberating! Why should I eat something that I don’t like? So I don’t…unless I am in the rare position where I am at someone’s home and I don’t want to offend them, I eat only things that I like. I like almost everything else any way. This makes a much happier me…it only took me 50 years to figure it out!
Maybe it’s just the word “purple”. It kind of reminds me of a disease.
But “violet”… now that sounds gorgeous.
I think everything is just a phase that goes by, some of them last longer and some shorter. While some things make us who we are and there’s no reason to force ourselves to change them, many others would do wonders if we embraced them. From my personal experience, you should try looking at things you dislike from the eyes of someone you like/admire/trust. E.g. I got into eating lettuce (after avoiding it for years) only after seeing if beautifully integrated into salads in blogs. Now this doesn’t mean I only liked lettuce because I love blogs and trust bloggers, but I went through a journey of seeing what I missed by others’ viewpoint. Hope this makes sense :)
CIDER! Love it now, but for years couldn’t stand apple cider. I persevered and now, nothing beats a cider on ice in the sun on a hot summers day!
I’ve never liked mushrooms. So many people like them though so I give them a chance at least a few times each year. I still don’t like them. I think I will keep giving them a chance though, but I’m not sure why.
I love purple so much that I named my daughter Violet. No joke.
If you really want to love purple, plant a lilac bush in your yard.
I like deep rich purple and also light lavender. I do not like bright Barney purple or the purple that little girls sometimes wear. I find that most colors have shades that I like. I have always said that yellow is my favorite color; however, I only like a buttery, sunshine shade of yellow, not mustard yellow. I think it is perfectly ok not to like a color! I find it interesting how colors affect us. Blues are calming and soothing and reds fire is up! I think that is important that people think about the colors that they choose to wear and surround themselves. I often wear black because it is slimming and sophisticated, but I wonder sometimes if it gives me negative energy. Not sure, but I know that I feel light when I wear white or lighter colors.