I Just Learned What the Term Incel Means

I’m sure you’ve heard the horrible news out of Toronto. As I’ve been reading about what happened, I kept seeing the word “incel” used when referring to Alex Minassian — the man who drove the van into the crowd and killed ten people. But I didn’t know what it meant. And then this Twitter thread by Arshy Mann showed up in my stream — it gives an overview of the term incel, a bit of the history, and explains why people are talking about it now. Here’s a little summary:

Come discuss this with me.

What’s Your Kid’s Favorite Candy Bar?


Pretend you’re standing in a check out line with your child. You’re at an old-school regular grocery store — not Whole Foods, not Trader Joe’s, not Stew Leonard’s. Just a regular grocery store. And you ask your child if they want to pick out a candy bar. What would they pick? Do you feel like you know their favorite?

This is on my mind because yesterday, Betty mentioned that she had won a prize from her church Sunday School teacher, and that she got to pick out any candy bar she wanted. She chose her very favorite: a Take Five. And I was like, “What in the world is a Take Five? And since when are they your favorite? I thought you were all about Twix bars.” 

It got me thinking about two things. First I asked myself: How well do I know my kids’ favorite things?

More favorites, and more candy bar talk, when you click through.

I Accidentally Fell In Love With Twitter Again

I joined Twitter in May of 2008. Which means I’m coming up on my 10 year Twitter anniversary. For reference, I started blogging in July 2006, and joined Twitter less than 2 years into blogging. At the time, it was pretty much the only social media option out there. Facebook hadn’t yet become widely available. And Instagram and Pinterest wouldn’t exist for a few years.

In 2008, I found Twitter to be fascinating and entertaining. Twitter gave birth to the hashtag and I loved seeing how creative hashtags took on a life of their own. In those days, you could get a topic trending with just a small group of people, and at conferences or events, we would do so intentionally and it felt super powerful. Sometimes, when there were too many people on Twitter, the site would shut down and instead, there would be an image of the “Fail Whale” displayed.

When I started my account, I followed everyone I knew personally online at the time — pretty much all bloggers. Later, when Twitter started feeling like an extension of my business, I took Twitter classes from experts like Guy Kawasaki and would try out whatever the current trends were. For example, there was a year or so where I tried the recommendation to follow back everyone who followed me, and I ended up following several thousand people. When Twitter lists were introduced (I think it was 2009), I made a bunch of them, all with silly headings like, “Knows How to Drive Stick,” “Secret Hippies,” and “Has a Good Fake British Accent.” And then never looked at them again till I eventually deleted them. 

Here’s why Twitter is my favorite social media platform these days.

A Few Things

Hello, Friends. How are you? Any fun plans for the weekend? We’ve got the usual kid stuff happening. June has a birthday party to go to. Oscar is babysitting for another family. Olive’s headed to a play. Betty has a rescheduled clarinet lesson. And on Sunday, Ben Blair is heading to San Diego for a few days. It’s for an accreditation conference — which reminds me, I haven’t updated you on Teachur in ages, but there’s tons of cool stuff happening. I’ll work on a post about it.

Other exciting things: Olive spent yesterday lobbying California politicians at the state capitol in Sacramento. Today, she helped organize the school walkout at the high school, and Oscar helped organize the National School Walkout at the middle school. The Walkout commemorates the 19th anniversary of the Columbine shootings, and is a call to end gun violence. I think it’s all happening right now as I type, and I’m sitting here hoping everything goes smoothly, and dying to hear a report when they get home.

How about you? Anything interesting happening at your house this weekend? While you’re making plans, here are a few things I’ve been wanting to share with you:

Thirteen links just for you.

How Often Do You Replace…?

Just curious. I see advice all the time on how often to replace things. Toothbrushes? They say at least every three to four months. Mascara? The recommendation is two to three months. Makeup brushes/applicators? Same: two to three months. Your mattress? You’ve got ten years. But your pillows? One to two years. Bath towels? Every two years. And spices? They say eight months to a year.

Of course, this is just a small list — there are replacement recommendations for pretty much everything.

I was thinking of this at Target the other night when I was buying toothbrushes. I’m pretty sure it’s been at least six months since the last time I bought some. I know that will gross some of you out. Honestly, I don’t think I regularly follow a single one of the recommendations I listed. Or if I do, it’s by accident.

The last time I replaced my mascara? Keep reading.



Design Mom is all about the intersection of design and motherhood. I'm Gabrielle Blair (some people call me Gabby), a designer and mother of six. I think you're going to love reading Design Mom.

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