Living With Kids: Mary Heffernan

April 29, 2014

By Gabrielle.

When Mary first contacted me about a possible tour, she was sweetly hesitant and sent along a few photographs to share the space she and her husband are living with their four daughters. As I always do, I asked for a few more and added a lot of exclamation points to my request.

And when she sent me many, many dozens scenes from her daily life, I spent a good afternoon poring over them. I had to beg Mary to edit them down for me because I simply could not! This tour would have included at least 750 photos! Because, Friends, this life of the Heffernans is pretty lovely. And busy. And thoughtful. And supremely well-designed. I love it all, and I hope it just makes your day, too.

(Just maybe, there will be a follow-up post this summer with all the photos I couldn’t use this time around! I’m keeping my fingers crossed, because I would really, really love a tour of the family businesses!)

Q: Please introduce us to your sweet family!

A: Hello! I’m Mary Heffernan, a mom and small town business owner and a country girl at heart. My husband Brian is a manly mountain man who is surrounded by a crazy wife and four independent, strong-willed little girls. Luckily, they tend to be tomboys and are out there hunting and fishing with him, so he couldn’t be happier. Brian and I met in 2006 at a charity event, where he was on the board and I was volunteering. Eight years later, we have four daughters and a fun and crazy life together, running a range of small businesses in Los Altos, California.

All four of our girls are named Mary, which makes traveling interesting! They are all named after different grandmothers, as we are both from big Catholic families with a lot of Marys! Our eldest, MaryFrances or Francie, is six and the leader of the pack. MaryMarjorie or Maisie, is four and a sweet, maternal soul. MaryJane or JJ is the wild child at three and full of personality and outfit changes. MaryTeresa, Tessa, is one year old and packs a punch to keep up with those big sisters! We have a chocolate lab named Moose, and three Navajo Churro rams on our ranch named Chief Big Horn, Geronimo, and Eugene.

My husband and I are both native Californians – my girls are 7th generation stock to Northern California! – and love the outdoors and wide open spaces. We live in the city, but our roots are in agriculture and farming on both sides. We escape to our ranch in Siskiyou County as often as possible to raise free range kids and – soon! – free range cattle and chickens to serve in our restaurants.

Q: How did this house become yours?

A: We feel very lucky to be stewards of this old house full of history. It was built in 1910 by a Southern Pacific Railroad executive for his wife, Rose Shoup, to raise their children when the area was nothing but apricot orchards and railroad tracks. Only three other families have lived here since then, so we are the fourth! The house was meticulously restored by the last family, the Jennings and their four children, to bring it back to life. We actually lived right next door while they restored it and got to watch the progress.

I grew up in a 100-year old house that my parents restored, so when the Jennings moved, we knew we had to raise our kids in that house. Now, my husband and I are slowly working on a big old house project on our ranch: fixing up an 1868 farm home built before electricity and running water. I guess you could say we are drawn to old houses and their stories. This house is on the historic registry, and we just hope to do it justice by filling it with family memories and lots of noise.

Q: What are the things that make you love where you live?

A: We love Los Altos! We live six blocks from our little downtown where my husband and I run our family-centric businesses. It’s a small town feel, but also close to so many great places: 45 minutes to San Francisco and just a few miles from Stanford, Palo Alto, and all the Silicon Valley hot spots. Our house backs up to Redwood Grove Nature Preserve and a great park, both with a creek running through. It’s a place which means hours of entertainment for my kids and where I also have many memories playing as a child.

The downtown has really seen a transformation over the past several years and we love being a part of it. There are so many families with young children in the area, and it’s a really great community to live and do business in. The weather is great, and we walk to town for work and school most days.

Q: Speaking of your family businesses, what sort of companies do you and your husband run?

A: Our businesses are built around family. We know people value good services and good food and try to offer both! Twelve years ago I started my first business, a tutoring company called Academic Trainers, and I met my husband when he was a lawyer in the area.

Since then, we have opened two restaurants, Bumble and Forest on First, that center around locally grown, healthy ingredients and a welcoming environment for families to feel comfortable bringing kids out to eat. We have a playroom in Bumble staffed with attendants to entertain kids while parents finish their meal in peace, and Forest on First has a gorgeous redwood and natural eucalyptus treehouse play structure with more casual cafe fare and an all-natural juice bar.

We also have a creative DIY supply and class shop called The Makery that is really fun and my happy place to craft and be inspired by the latest, coolest stuff made by our vendors and in-house staff! The Botanist is for all things beautifully botanical, like succulents and home decor and flea market finds galore. There’s a throwback arcade called Area 151, and an old school hobby shop called Red Racer, and a children’s drop-in class space called PLAY.

We are working on another restaurant to open this summer called The Alley with a local Michelin star chef, Marty Cattaneo – who I grew up with – to do really awesome burgers and locally produced fare.

And yes I know this seems a little insane – some days it is! But since most of the businesses are in the same town, it’s more like running one big business for our very loyal customers. Instead of taking one good idea and doing it multiple places, we found a captive audience hungry for good businesses and did multiple ideas in one place. It’s a great town for business!

Q: How do you divide professional and family duties, and also keep your relationship separate?

A: My husband and I certainly spend a lot of time together, so we try to balance it without driving each other crazy! He is the morning bird and wakes up early every day to get things prepared for the day. My downtime is staying under my down comforter a little longer!

We both walk the girls to school in the morning, then head to work. We are very fortunate my sweet cousin Emmy watches the babies and brings them to music class or for a snack at the restaurants, so we get to see them a bit during the day. My husband and I start our work day with breakfast together and our laptops at Bumble, then head to various meetings or dealings with employee issues and pow wows for what’s up next.

We wind down with a house full of kids to feed and sit down as a family for dinner every night if we can, even if we end up having to order in pizza or clean out the fridge for kid snacks! Our girls are night owls like I am, so I usually wrangle bath time and talk them into going to sleep. Working together was a bit of an adjustment for sure, but once you get used to seeing each other ALL day, it’s hard to imagine going back!

Q: You’ve got some really dark and moody rooms, and one very bright white kitchen! I love it all! Tell us your color philosophy and whether you feel the need to stay true to the original style of this home? Any changes you wish you could make?

A: The house has a lot of period specific style. We try to stay true to the craftsman style and work with a lot of beautiful, dark woodwork. The kitchen is a bright white open space for gathering and family chaos.

When the house was built, the kitchen was very small and mostly used for the staff to prepare meals for the first owners, the Shoups. My, how times have changed! Now it is the gathering place for entertaining our family and friends.

My husband is the cook in the family and we love to wind down in the kitchen with the girls, usually throwing food around or dancing half-dressed around the island. It’s never quiet in our house!

Many of the colors were here in the house when we moved in, but I painted a few rooms a little more neutral. But I am a big fan of color and saturation! I think the house needs some deep color to compliment the beautiful dark wood that has all been stripped back to original wood after being painted white at one point! It works here.

Any changes? Maybe picking this house up and moving it to the country with wide open spaces around it!

Q: How do you manage your collections? What are your favorite things to collect, and how do you decide when or if to cull?

A: My mom, aunts, and grandmother were big antique collectors, and I have inherited many of their pieces. I went to college in Virginia and found some neat stuff there to fill my little college house I shared with seven friends. Now, I love to scour flea markets and collectible sales!

Alameda Antique Fair is always a good bet, and last year we took a trip to Canton, Texas for First Monday Trade Days to fill a U-Haul for The Botanist. We found some really amazing stuff and the prices couldn’t be beat.

Right now my favorite collection is vintage kilim rugs. I have them in almost every room in the ranch cabin, and somehow still feel the need for more! I am not very good at cutting myself off from a collection; I like to repurpose and put the old ones someplace new to make room for new ones. Sometimes they even end up for sale at one of the businesses!

Q: What memories do you hope with all your heart that your girls take from this home and from their childhoods? What do you hope they remember specifically about the kind of mom you’re trying to be for them?

A: I hope they remember playing with each other, cementing those long-lasting, sisterly bonds outdoors and in the sunny windows of our home. We don’t have a working TV – it’s been too complicated to set up since we moved in, so we gave up and got used to it! – so they spend a lot of time creating games and forts or stirring up a ruckus with the neighbor girls, who also have four girls under the age of seven!

I only hope I can be half the mom to my girls that my mom was to me! The get-on-the-floor-to-play-board-games kinda mom. I hope technology hasn’t interfered too much so they remember me with an iPhone in my hand…but technology does allow me to work a lot and be a present mom during the day or when we travel, which I am very grateful for.

Q: What has been your favorite part of living with your own girls? What has surprised you the most about being a mom? What do you already miss as they get older?

A: Living with four girls, each with their own distinct and strong personality is a new adventure everyday! I love when they all crowd around me to tell me about their day or latest discovery. It’s chaos and crazy, but I know I will miss these days and try to savor them. We entertain a lot, but my favorite days are hanging out at home, just our family, sitting on the front porch while the girls run around in the yard.

I am most surprised about how much of myself I see in them, especially Francie, the eldest, and how she knows just how to push my buttons! You can’t get much past her and I see so much of myself in her. She reminds me to find some patience, and it takes a lot of mental work to best figure out how to discipline or encourage her…I guess the oldest is usually the guinea pig on this front anyway, and she’s very tolerant of it!

I already miss so much about having a squishy newborn and all those baby stages! Now that Tessa is a growing toddler, I am missing the baby phase and all that comes with it…well MOST of what comes with it! I think we are good for now with four, but maybe a surprise baby down the road wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

Q: Please finish the sentence: I wish someone had told me…

A: I wish someone had told me to slow down and soak it in. I am trying to remember that, but life is so busy and crazy that I know I will look back and think I should have been more present for these early years.

They are very special times and I try to be there as much as I can, but working and life sure do get in the way. When we can escape to the ranch, life is so different and a much slower pace. It really makes me look at our busy life at home and want to press pause!

–-

Mary, I am the same way about about technology! I want my kids to remember me as present, but the fact is that I can be present more often with technology at my fingertips wherever I may be. Thank you for the tour; your home and life are dizzyingly delightful!

Friends, do any of you work with your partners, either in the same space, in the same business, or the same industry? How do you separate your personal relationship from your professional connection? Is that even possible? (For me, I consider it such a gift that I get the chance to work alongside Ben Blair on a daily basis. He is the very best partner-in-crime for me!)

P.S. – Are you interested in sharing your own home with us? Just send me a note! It’s a lot of fun…I promise! Take a peek at all the homes in my Living With Kids series here.

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{ 36 comments… read them below or add one }

1 sarah k April 29, 2014 at 1:55 pm

As a fellow lover of old houses, living in a 1926 beauty myself, I adored all these images. I am especially smitten with the kitchen and pinning it in my inspiration folder for a someday reno. I LOVE the dark restored woodwork with the gleaming white kitchen. Our woodwork was all painted white before we bought the house, and the paint peels and chips off terribly on the gorgeous old windows. I dream of stripping them down.

Just one question: something against the letter Q? :) It’s omitted from the alphabet wall in the reading nook.

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2 Mary Heffernan April 29, 2014 at 8:11 pm

Ha Sarah K – good catch! When I ordered the Land of Nod white letters they were out of the letter Q and we just made due without it (I am not very patient:) but we give a prize to anyone who comes over and notices the omission – so good eye!! :)

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3 Lauren April 29, 2014 at 10:51 pm

I am so glad you asked, Sarah K! I was dying to know!

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4 Melissa May 1, 2014 at 8:02 pm

Haha. So was I!
Besides that, this house is obviously amazing, but it also feels like a home. Love.

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5 Holly April 29, 2014 at 3:15 pm

I have worked alongside my husband running 2 businesses almost as long as we have been married. I wouldn’t know what to do if we were not with each other nearly every day. Sometimes, it makes me crazy, but most days I feel truly blessed. We juggle the work and the 3 kids, and we do pretty good with all of it! I don’t know if we could tackle more than two businesses—by the way love the home tour. Sounds like a great place and lovely home to grow a beautiful family! I wish I had a front porch like that one!!

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6 becky April 29, 2014 at 4:20 pm

I LOVE this house! This is the ying to my white-on-white yang. I love all the character and warmth and charm. And Mary is living my dream of opening a gagillion small business in our small town. And now that I have pinned them all, the next time I’m up north…many a field trip has been planned. Thanks for such a wonderful peek into your life! (I want to see so much more of it! – inspiring)

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7 Amy April 29, 2014 at 5:05 pm

Mary, I love the pink white and red carpet in the play room. Do you mind sharing where that came from? I loved your house tour. Thanks!

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8 Mary Heffernan April 29, 2014 at 8:12 pm

Hi Amy! thanks so much – the rug in the playroom (with flowers?) is from the Land of Nod – we love all of there stuff!

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9 lisa leonard April 29, 2014 at 5:22 pm

Gorgeous home and family!

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10 Holly Andler April 29, 2014 at 6:32 pm

i was reading this thinking that i have read about this family before and then realized i had in the land of nod catalog. what a neat family story that they are still writing daily in a beautiful house with a beautiful family. i can’t imagine running that many businesses, but all of them sound amazing!

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11 Jamie April 29, 2014 at 7:02 pm

What a beautiful home and family!

They were also featured on the Land of Nod website a while back:

http://www.landofnod.com/Real-Families/Heffernan

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12 RobinW April 29, 2014 at 7:19 pm

Stunning, amazing, gorgeous home! Love it!!!

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13 Hayley April 29, 2014 at 8:49 pm

Shout out to Canton, Texas, y’all! I leave about 45 minutes from there so I can visit often – however I don’t get over to First Mondays as often as I would like (I am going this Saturday, I need some baskets!) Funnily enough, I keep trying to make it to SF for the Alameda market and never can hit it at the right time of the month.

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14 Jennifer April 29, 2014 at 9:17 pm

What a cool house and decorating style! I would love to read a post about their businesses too!

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15 Kate April 29, 2014 at 9:35 pm

What a gorgeous tour! Mary, I’m a “neighbor” in Mountain View who is a regular at many of your businesses. It’s neat to learn more about the family behind these restaurants and stores that bring so much goodness and beauty and family-ness to the community. Thank you! And in a future post, I’d love to hear more about the ranch! Sounds equally dreamy!

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16 Jules April 29, 2014 at 11:19 pm

Okay, I had to comment, as a mama of three girls who dreams of a country house to grow free- range children too :) I used to teach in Los Altos- such a fun city with a small town feel. My favorite? That beautiful white kitchen! It really does pop and feel so fresh against all of the darker colors in the tour. Love it.

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17 Tracy April 30, 2014 at 6:33 am

Hi Mary-

Your home is beautiful. I love your decorating style. I really liked the sign, “Home is Wherever you Are” sign. Can you tell me where you got it?
Thanks!!

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18 Mary Heffernan April 30, 2014 at 11:14 am

thanks Tracy! We drew the “Home is Wherever You Are” sign on an old chalkboard – it’s lasted long enough for no one to wipe their hands all over it… yet! :)

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19 Faith April 30, 2014 at 7:56 am

Hi.

Very lovely home. I was wondering where you got the horses in the toy room?

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20 Mary Heffernan April 30, 2014 at 11:15 am

Hi Faith! The horses are mostly old hand-me-downs – they don’t make them like that much anymore! But sometimes eBay or flea markets have them.

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21 .ivy April 30, 2014 at 8:51 am

What a beautiful house! I just hopped over to their family blog and got lost for a bit… This is the Christmas jammies family! =)

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22 Susan April 30, 2014 at 9:37 am

As a longtime Los Altos resident, it’s great to get a peek inside Shoup House and see it full of family life yet still true to its Craftsman roots. While Los Altos has always been a fantastic place to raise kids, Mary’s businesses have brought a tremendous new energy to town. Crossing my fingers that you follow through on the idea of coming down for a day to have Mary show you around – you’ll be amazed!

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23 Christina April 30, 2014 at 4:38 pm

Mary, I laughed out loud with your girls’ names. Love it! My sisters and I all had the middle name of Marie and of seven children, my husband and I have two daughters who have a Marian name…one is Marie and one is Miriam…both middle names for them. I had three more forms of Mary, but the boys came instead! Love your home and story! If my husband ever ends up in the bay area for a conference, we will try to hit up one of your businesses. They sound delightful. And way to meet the needs of the family! Never have I been to a restaurant with a play room/bbsitting included – so very thoughtful of you!

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24 Jessie May 1, 2014 at 5:30 am

Mary! Your home is scrumptious. I particularly love how you embrace the beautiful old woodwork. My husband has a thing against painted wood – he appreciates the natural beauty of wood itself. I agree, but sometimes I find myself frustrated with how wood can appear dated or limit my design potential. My home was built in the fifties and all of the wood is a slightly orange color! I adore the beautiful dark woodwork in your home.

Thank you for sharing such a perfectly designed home. The photos show a certain maturity in the design, but balanced well with the bright, cheery colors. I can just picture your girls growing up there, from the whimsy of childhood with a bright pink play room to glamorous teenage gatherings and weighty college conversations down the road. Well done!

ps – DesignMom, this is my first comment on a home tour, but let me tell you I look forward to Tuesday’s postings!

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25 Design Mom May 2, 2014 at 12:59 am

Yay! So glad you like the series, Jessie.

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26 Mary May 1, 2014 at 7:00 am

I am loving this series as well, and I just wanted to jump in and say that I want to eat at your restaurant! I comment all the time about how there should be restaurants with a playspace for the kids. I’d eat there all the time!

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27 Nina May 1, 2014 at 10:06 am

I am so crazy about this house and the life of this family. It’s amazing, so inspiring! I’m going to have to go down to Los Altos and check out their restaurants and shops! Thank you for this!

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28 carin hoffman May 1, 2014 at 12:00 pm

Love this house! Can you tell my where you purchased your bar stools?

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29 Jo June 7, 2014 at 7:14 pm

Yes! I love the bar stools as well – where did those come from?

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30 Deborah May 2, 2014 at 7:34 am

Loved the home tour! But was equally impressed with how creative this family is with all their restaurants and shops! I checked out all the web site links and they look amazing! Too bad I don’t live closer but maybe a great excuse to go to Los Altos for a visit! What a family!!

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31 heidi May 6, 2014 at 7:22 pm

Loved your home. I thought I was done with 4, but a 5th was icing on the cake! Can’t imagine life without her. I love the idea of having a place for the kids to play while the parents finish their meal.

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32 Mary Heffernan May 9, 2014 at 1:42 pm

Thanks Heidi! That is goo to hear the 5th was “icing on the cake” :) maybe someday!!

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33 Mary Heffernan May 9, 2014 at 1:42 pm

Thanks for all the sweet comments! This was so much fun to be a part of! :) – Mary

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34 Nicole Bagai July 3, 2014 at 1:36 pm

What a lovely home and family! Thank you for sharing:) my husband and I often walk in to town( we live about a mile from DT Los Alstos) and really want to try both their way cute, inticing menu, chic decor restaurant but we have not…our Burnese Mt. Dog(Arthur ) is our baby and we would not dream of walk to town with out him. They are the only restaurant , outside The Grill , that does not allow dog on the patio:( Hopefully their policy changes soon for all the dog loves in LS! ???

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35 isamu kagawa July 17, 2014 at 11:14 am

If Rose and Paul Shoup knew the Heffermans, they would be very very Happy to know such nice people are living there. I lived there at their estate and my best years were the greatest there

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