The First Kiss

September 3, 2013

By Gabrielle. Kiss Kiss by Stephanie Sterjovski.

I just heard the funniest story about growing up! My friend’s teen daughter — after almost a full year of crushing on a boy, hanging out together in groups on the weekends, and non-stop talking about dating as soon as their parents allowed it — finally experienced her first kiss.

My friend thought she had prepared her daughter for everything. How to always trust her gut. Avoid anything and everything that makes her feel worried or rotten. Be nice. Be forgiving. Be confident in her choices. And most importantly, if she can’t tell her mom about it — whatever it may be — she’s not ready for it.

The girl came home from a skateboarding date with her gaggle of friends, and pulled her mom aside. “He kissed me,” she said.

My friend said relief flooded her entire body. It worked. It worked! She could tell her mom about it!

As parents, we spend years instilling values and virtues and every idea we’ve got that could possibly make our kids better people. (Or at least people who get through life with a minimum of poor choices and without offending everyone they meet!) It’s tiresome. Exhausting. Excruciating some days. But the one afternoon when it all comes together is pure joy.

Here’s the funny part. The sweet girl, after replaying the entire event for her mom, made a little embarrassed face and said, “It was nice. But, Mom… he tried to lick my teeth.”

There’s always one detail we miss, isn’t there? What do you say, Friends? Want to spend the day reminiscing about your first kiss? I say yes!

P.S. — Mine was after a football game when I was a sophomore in high school. But I won’t name names. : )

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WEEKLY WONDERS |
September 7, 2013 at 12:55 am

{ 42 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Kate T. September 3, 2013 at 7:27 am

Mine was with a boy who had extensive orthodontia. Ouch! Do not recommend.

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2 Katy @ All Sorts of Pretty September 3, 2013 at 7:32 am

Oh my gosh! I haven’t thought about my first kiss in years (it wasn’t one for the books…) BUT this post reminds me that I too told my mom that same day, as soon as she picked me up from the movies where the kiss happened. She squealed with excitement for me, saying typical mom things about growing up, milestones, etc – and then mortified me when she asked if she could tell my dad! Looking back now, after reading this post, that part of telling my mom of my first kiss was much more influential on my life and more memorable than the actual kiss. (And now I’m weepy and want to call my mom to tell her I love her!) :)

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3 Emily September 3, 2013 at 7:33 am

One of the counselors at nature camp when I was 16–a boy my older brother’s age who my best friend had had a crush on n(but was over it)–haha, great memories

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4 Kristian September 3, 2013 at 7:53 am

I went to a theatre camp where we wrote our own (very very short) plays that got performed. Mine ended up being a monologue about having never been kissed, which our director loved, but he suggested having someone come out and kiss me for the first time on stage the night it was performed. What! Luckily I did end up liking a boy a the camp there and even more luckily, we actually took the plunge and kissed a few days earlier, privately. Our cast was a little miffed at us for “taking away the romance” but I was glad to have a private moment for something like that. Still, a good story retell now I suppose.

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5 Valerie September 3, 2013 at 8:05 am

I made it until a month before my 19th birthday and I was working at a scout ranch, where I met a cute ranger and we went off base on the 4th of July to see fireworks over a lake, and with a setting like that it was bound to happen. But I remember thinking that kissing was kind of weird. Luckily it gets better with practice ;)

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6 Pamela Balabuszko-Reay September 3, 2013 at 8:38 am

Oh that made me laugh! He tried to lick my teeth! I love it.

My first kiss? Meh.

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7 Franci September 3, 2013 at 9:11 am

The morning after prom, in my parents’ kitchen. I still remember what I was wearing (red thermal shirt and overalls– it was the 90s!). Couldn’t sleep afterwards and spent the day mooning over the moment. Definitely a good memory, even if that boy is long gone.

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8 Christy@SweetandSavoring September 3, 2013 at 9:23 am

That’s nice when daughters can go to their mothers about kissing & romance in their teens. I hope if I ever have a daughter that we have that kind of relationship!

I was older than everyone I know- 18- when I had my first kiss. We were sitting alone, in my parents’ house, and were both nervous, but I was so excited when we finally got started. Finally! :)

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9 Em-Cat September 3, 2013 at 9:50 am

That’s really great that your friend’s daughter could confide in her. My mom tried to put the fear of God in me if I kissed before I was 16. It didn’t work. It made me not want to talk to her about things. My first kiss I was 14 and, lucky for my mom, it was extremely un-romantic. I wasn’t sure why the movies made it look so good. Luckily things got better as I got older!

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10 Caitlin Mallery September 3, 2013 at 10:03 am

That is really great to hear that girls still tell their moms about it. My first kiss was on my wedding day, when we heard the words, ” You may kiss the bride.” I love that it was that way, and the kiss was generally greeted by hoops and hollers, and described by one of my sister-in-laws as “Steamy!”

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11 Jennifer September 3, 2013 at 6:02 pm

So sweet!

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12 lindsey September 3, 2013 at 10:06 am

Thanks for posting this – I really love the advice of “if you can’t tell me (mom) about it then you aren’t ready for it”. My mom was a better mom than her own was in this department by far, but I never could tell her anything along these lines. I am really hoping to be able to have this type of open relationship with my daughters, but I do lack personal experience of how to keep these doors open– so I LOVE/NEED this type of advice and tips. I hope your move/transition back to the states is going as well as it can!

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13 bestof2sisters September 3, 2013 at 10:28 am

Hahah :) What a sweet story.

I remember my first kiss well, on a swing at a playpark one evening… I’d had a crush on him for ages, I was 16, and then all I could think was: eww, so wet.

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14 Raleigh-Elizabeth September 3, 2013 at 10:45 am

My first kiss remains so mortifying to me. How could there be something so basic that seemingly requires an extensive base of knowledge you are absolutely positive you don’t have? I was petrified. It’s that fear that STILL gets me when I think about it! Nevertheless, it was in a beautiful park, in late Spring, just as all the pink blossoms were falling off the trees… very fairy-tale. (Sadly, I have no idea what the guy is doing today. So not too fairy-tale.) In retrospect, though, I really wish someone had told me the secret: There is no secret. There is no skill. Your will *just know* what to do.

And that’s mostly true, isn’t it?

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15 Kimberly September 3, 2013 at 11:58 am

I was fifteen and it was at a friend’s sweet sixteen party. The song was “Always” by Atlantic Starr. (“…come with me my swee-EEEEt, let’s go make a famileee-eee…”) We just mooshed lips together, not knowing what else to do!

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16 Ellen September 3, 2013 at 12:12 pm

Guess I was an early bloomer! It was the summer of 5th grade (so I would be 11) and I kissed Scotty during a round of spin-the-bottle. Just lips, no tongue. Nice. That’s it. But then when I was in seventh grade, a boy who I liked came over to my house, took me behind the pine trees, and french kissed me. Honestly, I thought I was going to throw up! Wasn’t ready for that!!! And I never told my mom any of it. We just didn’t have that kind of relationship. Still don’t. But my 9 year old daughter is very open with me and confides in me so I hope she will tell me when it is her turn. And I really like the “if you can’t tell your mother about it, you are not ready” part. Need to remember that one!

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17 Stella September 3, 2013 at 12:41 pm

HAhahaha! I was in college and had been in love with this boy for months. This is a bit embarrassing… but it was in the back of his car! And it ended up being a total make out and totally awesome. I was very, very happy. Good memories even though the relationship didn’t last. :)

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18 Mary {My Life in Scotland} September 3, 2013 at 1:44 pm

My first kiss was good. Oh so good!! No awkwardness or anything. It was so good. *le sigh*

BUT, I was a first kiss for someone. And it was NOT good. I mean…he kiterally came at me from across the room with his mouth open and tongue out. I had to brace myself. Then he just kept jabbing his tongue in and out. Poking. Weird. So weird. But, that’s what happens when you’re 22 yrs old and have never been kissed. I guess.

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19 Jessie September 3, 2013 at 1:48 pm

What a cute story!
My first kiss was in 6th grade on a swing set. I was crazy about this boy for years when we finally kissed while playing butterfly (does anyone else remember that?!) – unfortunately, he said it was just an accident. :(

blog.gramercystudio.com

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20 Robin September 3, 2013 at 1:48 pm

Back in a hotsprings cave in Nelson, BC on a band trip. He sang Blue Moon and kissed me. He was the cutest boy around and I was the shyest 16 year old girl. It was fun and did amazing things for my self confidence.

What a fun conversation. I am grinning ear to ear.

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21 Colleen September 3, 2013 at 1:55 pm

I was seventeen and he was a really cute foreign exchange student. It was at night on the sidewalk off of State Street, so we got lots of honks and hollers! It is a sweet memory even if he was a little too liberal with the tongue business.

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22 Design Mom September 3, 2013 at 2:06 pm

The comments on this post have me grinning!

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23 Catie September 3, 2013 at 3:16 pm

I was young, only 12 years old. The boy was my “boyfriend”, which consisted of us saying that we were “going out”, but we never went anywhere or even hung out with each other after school. On the fateful day, breaking our normal routine, my boyfriend asked if he could come over. He rode his bike to my apartment building and we went to where the mailboxes were and he gently pushed me against the wall and kissed me on the cheek and then in one very swift and surprising movement, stuck his tongue in my mouth. He didn’t move it around or anything, it was just in my mouth. We stayed like that for what felt like ever, but I’m sure it was just a couple of seconds. I pulled away and then spit. The whole thing seemed horribly unhygienic to me. I didn’t kiss anyone again until I was 15.

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24 Chantalle September 3, 2013 at 3:34 pm

16, at a park. He ended up being the only one I ever kissed- we didn’t date exclusively for a couple of years, but no one was ever good enough to me. Now we’ve been married 8 years and have 3 kids- and I’m glad I didn’t have to go through any frogs! :)

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25 bdaiss September 3, 2013 at 3:53 pm

Oh, what a fun conversation! I’m afraid I don’t remember the details of my very first kiss (although I do remember who). But perhaps that’s because I was young (6th grade) and it wasn’t much more than the kiss I would get from a relative. I do remember my first french kiss. After a school basketball game, saying goodbye, he was older (of course), and feeling SO grown up and yet so over the moon giddy at the same time. And yes…it was very good. No frog there!

Aren’t first kisses the best? (Be it your first first kiss or just your first kiss with this one…)

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26 Val September 3, 2013 at 4:19 pm

Love this! So very fun to reminisce, and to read everyone else’s comments!

My first kiss is still burned in my memory: I was a 15, on a band trip in LA (from Utah), and we’d sneaked up to the 16th floor of the hotel we were staying in. It was short, but very sweet.

Sadly, I couldn’t share any of those kinds of details with my mom, so I’ve striven really hard to have a more open relationship with my girls. It was so cool to have my oldest daughter come home and share her first kiss with me. Here’s hoping the other two are as open :)

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27 SGB September 3, 2013 at 4:37 pm

I agree, this is such a fun topic! Mine was when I was about 13 – it was the first kiss for both of us and it was magical. That relationship lasted 2 years – then we broke up and I met another guy who was not so good for me and an awful kisser… then my first kiss boyfriend & I got back together a while later and we’re now married! And kissing is still awesome.

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28 Jennifer September 3, 2013 at 6:00 pm

My first kiss was with my first and only boyfriend who I married eight months later! I was 25 and had waited to date and kiss a long time, so I let him know I had built up the idea of a first kiss quite a bit by that age. He did not disappoint. He kissed me in the rain at a lighthouse overlooking the Puget Sound. After one long sweet kiss I asked for more and we both smiled the entire hike back to the car. I still love kissing him!

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29 Tere September 3, 2013 at 8:13 pm

I loved the advise, just in time, my eldest is 11 now. And these stories!!! Awesome to read them!! Mine was at age 20, with my husband, a sweet little kiss. But after many years he confessed he thought it was awful to share the wet part of it and spit when I wasn’t looking, unbelievable! Haha! I still laugh and rub it to his face. We got better too.

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30 Joan September 3, 2013 at 10:39 pm

Mine must have been awful, because I can’t remember! Seriously! I can’t! I can tell you, with absolute certainty, that I DID NOT tell my mother. Sad. :( I’m hoping for so much more for my daughter and I. I do remember the first time my husband kissed me. Does that count?

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31 bh September 4, 2013 at 1:51 am

Why should kids tell their parents about their first kiss? I don’t get it.

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32 Meghan September 11, 2013 at 8:02 pm

I think the idea is that if the child is willing to talk to the parent about his/her first kiss, he or she will also be willing to be open with the parents about having sex and other sexual activities.

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33 Grace September 4, 2013 at 4:18 am

My first kiss was at 15 (it seems that’s a popular first kiss age from the looks of it). I was dating my very first boyfriend who I had known since age 10 (we were on the same swim club, the Barracudas ^_^) and we had been dating for 3 months when it (finally) happened. During passing period at school, right before my biology class, he pulled me aside and kissed me. I was so overjoyed and embarrassed! Cheeks red as can be we said our goodbye and I ran into class and immediately wrote “HE KISSED ME!!!!” in my planner. Couldn’t get the grin off my face. And I still have that planner :)

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34 PL September 4, 2013 at 7:21 am

The first kiss, such memories. Mine was in the front seat of my boyfriend’s car. We were in college and I was 20. I always felt bad that I hadn’t been kissed before, felt unattractive and insecure about it. I have now been married to that boy for 30 years and it is a glorious marriage. Things work out!

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35 katie September 5, 2013 at 2:53 pm

So sweet. ^^^

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36 Jo September 4, 2013 at 8:31 am

I was 17 and playing the lead in a high school play. There was a short kissing scene with one of my best guy friends (the male lead). The kiss was weird and not all that great, which I expected since it wasn’t “real”. However, I went on to do a couple more plays that had kissing scenes and they were much more enjoyable. Years later, the guy with whom I had my first kiss came out of the closet. I think that explained why we never had great chemistry. :)

My first “real” kiss was when I was 18 with my now husband. He has been my only real kiss – ever.

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37 Maria B September 4, 2013 at 12:09 pm

My first kiss was on my 11th birthday with my first crush, Josh Cooksey. After my birthday party when everyone else had left, he strode over to me confidently, gave me a necklace (which I later learned was actually the symbol for marriage!) and planted the sweetest kiss right on my lips. I was in swoony heaven…until I realized all that had taken place in front of the picture window at my house and my ENTIRE family had been sitting there watching the whole thing!!!!! *sigh* They definitely razzed me about it, but I was walking around all googly eyed for days. Oh Josh Cooksey how I loved thee!!
My first french kiss was in high school with a boy who basically just shoved his tongue around like a madman in my mouth for about 2 minutes until I finally said, “hey look at the time, I gotta go.” Decidedly less swoony!

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38 bec September 4, 2013 at 2:19 pm

My first kiss: I was 18 and at the prom. He kissed me and stuck his tongue in my mouth and flopped it around like a fish out of water. I didn’t tell my mother because I was embarrassed that I had wasted my first kiss. I wasn’t very impressed. My next kiss was with the man who became my husband. Definitely a lot better ;)

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39 KelliO September 4, 2013 at 4:08 pm

For me, kissing was not a topic for family discussion! College roommates were a whole other issue. I don’t have much to say about my very first kiss. But, my first with the man I later married makes me laugh. He kissed me in the living room before going home for the night, and as he turned around I saw my own face in the mirror. I sure looked goofy! I felt all flushed, dazed, and giddy and it was hilarious to see what that looked like on my face. Love getting that feeling still!

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40 Dee September 5, 2013 at 11:23 am

So wonderful that she shares with her mom. Sounds like they have a great relationship. I hope I am building similar ones with my daughters. My first kiss was at the end of one tropical summer in my grandmother’s garden. I believe I was 12.

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41 Courtney September 5, 2013 at 2:13 pm

I’m married with a child and another on the way. I’ve been grown and gone for years now. I have a fantastic relationship with my parents. And I’m still mortified to even discuss mine and my husbands first kiss with my mother.

p.s. My first kiss was terrible. At the time I thought it was perfect. Now I loathe it.

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42 Megan September 6, 2013 at 8:42 pm

I’m curious about the super cute bracelets in the post photograph! Details?

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