By Gabrielle. (Who loves it when my kids wear Converse!)

My social media streams are overflowing with VMA reflections. Mostly poor, and it made me sad. (I used to love music awards shows with all the surprise guests and live performances, didn’t you?)

I’m a huge fan of kids growing up, expressing their own ideas, and finding their own style… within reason! (Because let’s be honest, you all know I’m a mom who loves to plan wardrobes for the entire school year.) But it has to happen. And we all probably cross our fingers and fill up the sky with prayers every night that it happens as safely — and the least outlandishly! — as possible.

Back to the VMAs. Maybe instead of focusing on which good girl was caught swearing in the audience, who was wearing not much at all, or which former Disney star is performing a little less sweetly these days, we should seek out young adults who are doing it right.

Tell me: Who are you encouraging as a good example to your teens? And who are they gravitating toward these days? (And what did they think of Miley? Oh, Miley.)