An Adoption Story by Jenny Newcomer

Seven years ago ovarian cancer and its treatment left me, left us, without any reproductive options. So we — my husband Will and I — opened our hearts, our minds, and adoption’s heavy door.

Whether it was our heart, our mind, fate, or a combination of all three, we adopted our daughter four years ago in what most would consider an ideal open adoption. We thank God for Sam, for her wonderful birth family, and, believe it or not, for the cancer that lead us to her.

Fear, however, did not abandon ideal. An emotional rollercoaster pulled up a chair and made itself comfortably uncomfortable in the months, weeks, and days leading up to the delivery: what if the birthmom changed her mind? Could we do this? How do we know? What if something, anything, goes wrong?

She didn’t change her mind — and the adoption went as smoothly as one could reasonably expect an arrangement that involves one woman handing a baby over to another woman to go. The emotions were many and multiple — and I vowed to cherish every moment — quiet, loud, overwhelming, and miraculous — with our little girl because I knew many of those I experienced waiting for her weren’t ones I would experience again.

Until now. We decide to try to adopt a child again.

The tearful exchange of a precious little miracle from woman to woman those four years ago isn’t as vivid as it once was. But the swell of love from and because of that little miracle certainly is. Nothing compares to that swell—and the space for love that Sam has carved out in us is boundless. More love makes more love.

In the six months since Will grinned at my mention of baby number two, it’s the social worker at the door, not the UPS man; pages and pages of application and verification documents stand in piles on the desk not ultrasound imagess; fingerprints and background checks are complete; and we are number 37 on the adoption agency waitlist. After a year & half wait, little Henry arrived into the world destined for us.

From Jenny Newcomer of LobotoME.

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Note: for the duration of my pregnancy, I’ll be posting stories about pregnancy, childbirth and growing a family on Wednesdays. You can find them all by clicking here.